When it is 20 degrees and a bit breezy, I wear a double hat (I’m sure I’ve bored you with that fact more than a few times). There’s my little smartwool balaclava topped with my black sequined bomber hat, the one that The Commander gave me for xmas one of her last years. The Benevolent Despot saw it sitting on my desk the other day and pronounced it “blingy”. Or something like that. And it *is* blingy. The Commander was actually a little nervous about buying it for me (at Barish Brothers in Sault Ste. Siberia). I talked her into it. She tried to raise me to be genteel and elegant. Uhh… Sorry moom. Anyway, with that dynamic duo of hats, I feel totally cozy and well protected from the elements.

So, after I took my 0-skunk-30 walk and did my chores, etc., I was driving down the [icy] street in the Frog Hopper (wearing my hats), heading over to Barry Bagels to meet up with MMCB², and I saw a young woman with VERY short hair walking dogs WITHOUT A HAT! I cannot for the life of me figger out how people can go out in 20 degree weather without a HAT!I got to Barry Bagels and I was tsk-tsking around about people that don’t wear hats and when I was describing the woman’s short haircut, I kind of peered at MMCB₁ and said, “Like yours!” Guess what! MMCB₁ does not wear a hat either. She does not walk a dog but she does take walks. I think she has some earmuffs or something that she uses in a pinch. Reason? Hat hair. HAT HAIR? Hat hair… When I take my 0-skunk-30 walk, I have just gotten out of the shower. MY HAIR IS STILL WET! In fact, my hair is usually STILL WET when I get HOME from my 0-skunk-30 walk. At least it isn’t filled with ice, since it is totally covered up inside my HAT(S)! And anyway, I don’t really care what my hair looks like and neither do probably 99% of the people I have to deal with during the average day. (I love MMCB very much, hat or no hat, and they do not read this.)

Booooorrrrrrinnnnngggg? Yes. She’s talking about hats, fer kee-reist. I am sorry. I do not think you want me to talk to you like I talk to the radio these days. I am also gonna guess you do not want to hear a systems analyst’s take on how to begin to approach the multitude of issues that surround the immigration of human beings to our beautiful country. I mean besides handing down bombastic decrees without [apparently] thinking through the unintended(?) consequences that might result from disrupting the lives of a multitude of innocent human beings.

Love,
KW

P.S. If it’s cold out, please wear a hat!

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